Vile Part 14

After spraying Mr. Halstock with amnesia gas several times, Mortimer finally gets an appointment with Kevin Brick, a detective with a flat nose and flat hair. While Kevin is not the most attractive person, Mortimer tries not to judge. After all, Mortimer isn’t the most attractive person himself.

Perhaps behind the pimple scars and plump chin, this Kevin Brick has a mind as sharp as cheddar cheese. “What can I do for you, Mr., uh… Godhammer?”

After his trouble at the desk, our villain knows better than to tell the whole truth. Besides, if this is to be his first meeting with his arch enemy, there must be no direct talk of the matter at hand. Only allusions, illusions, and possibly delusions. “I’m looking for someone?”

“A missing person?”

“Of sorts.”

“And have you filed a missing persons report yet?”

This was already headed in the wrong direction. Why joy do police derive joy from making you fill out forms? “It’s not that sort of missing person. This is someone who is missing from my life.”

“Can you give me their description? When was the last time you saw them?” The detective produced a notepad and began jotting down various useless words on it.

“You don’t understand. It’s not a specific person who’s missing.”

“Is there any other kind of missing person?” asks Kevin.

“It’s more of a metaphorical use of the word missing.” This seems to get through to the detective, and Mortimer holds on to hope.

“Ah! Of course. So, metaphorically,” Kevin winks at our villain, “what would this person look like and where would they have been seen last?”

“Is there a different detective I can speak with?”

This question takes Mr. Brick by surprise, and he only looks quizzically at Mortimer.

“A smarter one, maybe?”

This is part 14 of Vile, a novel in progress. Please check out the beginning or the next part, if you’d like to.

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About CobraQuiz

A political writer.
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