Tag Archives: funny

Vile part 41

“I’ve realized that if I blow up Last Kale’s nuclear facility, the fun will be over, because you’ll all be dead,” explains our villain. “And we wouldn’t want that, now would we?” What remains of Last Kale’s police force listens … Continue reading

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Vile part 40

“I have an an announcement to make!” declares Mortimer through his new-found megaphone. “You killed him!” shouts Officer Draper. “And?” “And you said you wouldn’t.” “And I won’t kill you either,” says our villain, taking his silenced pistol from his … Continue reading

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Vile part 39

The police are uncomfortable, especially Ryan Summers, whose normal Sunday routine is to sleep in until noon, wake up and eat a bowl of fruit loops with his kids, then watch cartoons for a while. But this Sunday is different, … Continue reading

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Vile part 38

“No, not that,” says ZERO. “Who cares about them? I was talking about blowing up the nuclear plant.” Our villain has been so caught up in the morning’s revels that he has forgotten about his plans for the evening. “Oh, … Continue reading

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Vile part 37

For those who are curious, the signs he had posted say: Warning: Trespassers will be shot, broken, flayed, skewered, set on fire, or defenestrated. Their bodies will be donated to science.

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Vile part 36

Waking up from the best night’s sleep he’s had in years, our villain stretches his arms and yawns to ZERO, “Status report.” “What is this? Star Trek?” the supercomputer asks sarcastically. When Mortimer scowls in response, ZERO continues. “The police … Continue reading

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Vile Part 35

The bright fires and penetrating sounds of sirens die away as the helicopter chops its way across Last Kale, but as Mortimer nears his home, he finds more. Apparently the police had seen fit to raid his house while he … Continue reading

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